Are you letting him make you into His Bijar?

(Anxiety was a gift)

Often, I don't know why God puts something on my heart to share, but I know that if he puts it there, I'm supposed to listen. And so, I am reposting something I wrote a couple of years ago, with the confidence that someone out there reading this, needs to hear it today. 

God bless xx

 

Have you ever seen a Persian rug? I mean a ‘real’ Persian rug. Not a knock off version you might find at your local cheap shop. I’m talking about the real deal. The world renowned Bijar rugs that are woven in the city of Bijar, located in the northeast of Iran, in the Kurdish province.

Bijar has been famous for its rugs since the time of the first Persian Empire in 5^th Century BC.

A genuine Bijar rug is a hand-woven Oriental rug, woven by Kurdish weavers in the city of Bijar, Iran using time honoured weaving techniques that are unique to this particular area.

They have often been dubbed the “Iron Rugs of Persia” because of their remarkable durability, able to withstand up to 200 years or more, of heavy use.

The reason for their amazing robustness is found in the way the rugs are made. The Bijar rugs are made using a technique called “wet weaving”, a technique not used anywhere else.

This technique involves compressing the strands of wool tightly between rows of knots. After each row of knots have been tied, the weaver then inserts a weft. The weft strands are the horizontal threads that are interlaced with the vertical warp threads that form the foundation of the rug.

The wet weaving process requires dampening the wool as it is woven, giving it a pliability it wouldn’t normally have.

After the weft has been inserted horizontally, a heavy metal comb or hammer is used to beat down the weft strands and the knots, creating a dense, tightly woven fabric that as it dries, shrinks somewhat, leaving a very compact, firmly constructed, strong, durable and long-lasting rug.

The dampening, the tightly formed knots and the heavy pounding are what gives the rugs their extreme durability and longevity.

So, how does any of this apply to us and our Christian walk?

God wants to turn us into his Bijars.

Yes, you read that right. God wants to use the poundings in our lives, the trials, the difficult seasons, the job losses, the cancer, the grief, the unexplained anxiety, the debilitating depression – to weave a divine strength into our hearts.

Just 8 years ago, I was a different person than I am today.

For 6 months I fought an internal battle. An unexplained battle with depression, anxiety and panic attacks that literally took my breath away, threatening to take me out completely. It had made itself at home and nothing I could do seemed to shake it. Everything I tried failed.

But as I struggled along, fighting attacks of the devil, fighting within myself, crying out to God, letting my emotions overwhelm me, I began to let the Word of God wash over my soul. I began to read my Bible more. I began to pray like never before. I wrote out countless verses on little note cards and plastered them all over the place. I cried through more worship songs than I can count, I played the piano for our church through tears, eyes closed, the turmoil raging inside of me.

But while I was being pounded by waves of fear, while I struggled through days where I didn’t want to get out of bed, while I neglected friendships and often tried to put on a brave face hoping others wouldn’t notice, God was working. God was weaving threads of strength through my pain.

God was weaving a divine strength in my heart that would stand the test of time. He was using his iron tool to beat me down, but not with the intent of crushing me and rendering me useless. He was doing a purifying work, a work that would see me rise up stronger, more reliant on him, more compassionate towards others, more useful in his work and with a heart that desired him more than anything else.

By God’s grace, I did come through my period of trial. I had victory over anxiety. I had victory over fear.

With each day, I became increasingly stronger. My faith grew. God’s hammer of anxiety began to add a row of knots into the tapestry of my life, dampened with my many tears, the weft he wove added strength to my inmost being. And eventually, I realized that anxiety had no power over Christ. Fear had no hold on God. It couldn’t hold God and it couldn’t hold me.

I recognized that no matter what, Jesus would hold me. He wouldn’t let me go. He would continue to love me. To defend me. To keep me. He wouldn’t forsake me, and all my emotional needs were met in him. He was enough.

The fear that paralyzed me no longer held a deathly grip on me.

The depression that threw me into the dark abyss no longer overwhelmed me.

The cloud of anxiety that hung overhead was no longer there.

John 16:33 These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.

But just because I was able to make it through this difficult season of my life, doesn’t mean I don’t find myself struggling with anxiety every now and then. It no longer has a hold on me, but I do feel its sting from time to time.

The difference is that the fear no longer paralyzes me. It doesn’t dictate to me my course of life. The peace that Jesus gave me then, I still have access to now.

All the verses of Scripture that I read over and over and the promises I clung to are still found in the pages of my Bible and they still apply.

I have more ammunition in my tool belt to fight off Satan’s attacks and I have a strength woven into my being that wasn’t there before.

So, when those moments of fear come upon me and I feel like I might go under, I rise up and hold onto what I learnt in those dark days. I cry out to God and remind him of his promises. I remember my past victories, and I open my lips and praise him.

God wants to make us his Bijars. His rugs that stand the test of time. Durable. Strong. Still vibrant and useful after years of use. Beautiful works of art.

You may be in a season of pounding right now. God may be using things in your life to build strength and resilience and reliance on him.

You may be facing things in your life that make you wonder if you can even last another day.

You may be hammered by trials, by fear, by rejection, by insecurities.

Don’t resist his iron tools, his wetting of the fabric of your life, his tying of knots and weaving in and out. He is working to create a masterpiece. A work of art.

His pounding can bring new strength.

Romans 5:3-4 And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope:

I never realised at the time that my anxiety was a gift. It felt like a cruel cross that I had to bear. But God used it to purify me and help draw me closer to him. He developed in me a love for him and his Word. He gave me a hunger and thirst for the Words of Scripture and a desire to study and grow in my relationship with him. He helped me to build a stockpile of promises I could cling to when times got rough.

He helped me to see the needs of others with a heart of compassion. He began to stir my heart to be sensitive to those around me and reach out and love others that needed a friend. He brought a peace to my heart that I had never known and a peace that could be a testimony to others of God’s goodness.

I am not the same person I was back then. I am being made more like Christ. Slowly but surely, through the trials God allows in my life, I am growing. I am far from perfect, but God is doing a work only he can do. He is cleaning out the things in my life that shouldn’t be there and replacing them with threads of various colours. Each line of weaving tells a different story. Each knot another tale. And the more I resist his workings, the uglier my tapestry becomes.

If I lay still under his hand, allowing his work to go on unhindered by my attitude and actions, he is able to create a masterpiece. Something that can show his glory and reflect his love. Oh, how I pray that I wouldn’t resist his workings and that I would submit to the hand of the master weaver.

Job 23:10 But he knoweth the way that I take: 

when he hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold.

Psalm 51:10 Create in me a clean heart, O God; 

and renew a right spirit within me.

 

 

 

You can ask Him for it

 

After a conversation with a friend this morning, I have begun diving down a rabbit hole to try and make more sense of a verse I’ve never fully looked at. So, if you’re interested, put on your head lamp and climb down with me.

Psalm 86:17 KJV - Shew me a token for good; that they which hate me may see it, and be ashamed: because thou, LORD, hast holpen me, and comforted me.

It’s this idea of a ‘token for good’. What does it even mean? Maybe you’ve already got it all figured out, if so, feel free to scroll on. But for those of you who want to learn more about what David was talking about when he penned this particular Psalm, stay with me.

Let’s start at the beginning.

The book of Psalms is a collection of 150 Hebrew poems, songs, and prayers that express praise, lament, thanksgiving and trust in God. It was written by multiple authors over a period of approximately 900 years beginning with the time of Moses. It is divided into 5 books, so scholars tell us, and this particular Psalm is part of book 3.

It is the only Psalm in this part of the book that is labelled ‘a prayer of David’.

We are drawn straight into the Psalm with a cry for help. Psalm 86:1 Bow down thine ear, O LORD, hear me: for I am poor and needy. David paints a picture of prayer and urgency and emotionally charged fears.

This Psalm was written during a time of persecution for David. Either Saul’s pursuit (1 Samuel 19-26) or Absalom’s revolt (2 Samuel 15-18). David was in distress, surrounded by his enemies and he knew his limitations and that he couldn’t fight his battles on his own.

We see David asking for mercy. For help. For God to listen to his cries. But we also see praise. We see him speaking of God’s goodness, his mercy, his greatness and for his ability to listen, answer and forgive.

So, when we come to the last verse of the Psalm, we see David asking for a ‘token for good’. Interestingly, he is not only asking it for himself, but also so that God may be revealed to his enemies as a God that is stedfast and loving. He wants God to be seen for who he really is. He wants others to see the goodness and greatness of God.

I’ve often quoted the phrase that we read in this verse, ‘token for good’, but not really thought too much about it. So, I decided it was time to think on it.

The word token is derived from the Hebrew term ‘ot’ which simply means a sign, or a proof of God’s favour. This particular word is used 79 times in the Hebrew, sometimes as token, sometimes as sign, miracle or mark.

“Tokens in biblical times held significant cultural importance. They were often used to signify agreements, treaties, or divine promises. The Israelites understood tokens not only as physical reminders but also as assurances of God’s presence.

In ancient Near Eastern cultures, covenants were often sealed with tokens or signs. These symbols served to remind both parties of their commitments. Similarly, in the Bible, tokens are often presented as divine assurances to reinforce the faithfulness of God in His covenants with His people.”

One of the most well-known mentions of a token in the Bible is found in the book of Genesis (9:12) when God gives a rainbow as a token of his favour and a sign that he will never flood the earth again. It is a token of hope.

We see it again in Exodus (12:13). Here the token is blood. The blood of the Passover Lamb is a token of God’s protection and deliverance to the Israelite people.

When David asks for a token of good, he is asking for a sign from God that he is working on his behalf. He wants to receive clear evidence of God’s goodness. He wants a reminder of God’s faithfulness.

And I believe that we are well within our rights as a child of God, to ask of him, a token for good.

Sometimes, when the waves rise above us, when the clouds are dark and the pathway before us becomes hazy and unsure, we need a token. We need a reminder of God’s goodness.

David didn’t just cry out for help. He asked for a clear sign that he was not abandoned. He was honest about how he was feeling. He laid it all out, but he held onto hope, kept praising in the storm, and waited in expectation for deliverance, asking for a sign to help him keep the faith.

It wasn’t so much that he doubted God’s goodness, but that he needed tangible evidence that God was still working, so that he could keep believing.

I don’t know what token it is that you need today that will speak to you. I don’t know what evidence it is that you need to keep you from letting go. I can only speak from personal experience.

Sometimes for me a token for good is the sound of a butcher bird singing his song on a quiet morning. Sometimes it’s a cool breeze. Sometimes it’s a cloud in the sky. Sometimes it comes in the form of a verse of scripture given at the exact moment it is needed. Other times it is a text from a friend. An encouraging word. A song or a moment of silence in an all too noisy world.

Whatever it is, it is yours to ask for. Ask God to give you a token for good. Ask him to reveal himself in a way that speaks to you.

It’s okay to ask for reassurance. We can ask for a sign of God’s presence in our lives. These assurances help to strengthen our faith during difficult times. It’s okay to ask. It is part of the faith journey we are walking.

Whatever it is that you are dealing with today, be open and honest with God about it. Don’t ever feel guilty about pouring your heart out to God. Be raw. Be vulnerable. Be real. Let the tears flow if need be. Let the words of frustration come out. Lay it all out. Give it to God. And ask him to give you a sign. A message of hope. In whatever form he sees fit. And then, watch for it.

What is the token for good that you can hold on to?

Remember don’t ask only for yourself. Remember that David asked also that God would be revealed to his enemies. He wanted God’s greatness to be shown. We need our tokens for good to show to a lost world that God is faithful. That he keeps his promises. That he is good even when things are not good in our lives.

And lastly, have confidence in God that he will do what he says. David ends the Psalm with these words:

…………….because thou, LORD, hast holpen me, and comforted me. He closes with a note of confidence. David had seen God work before, and he knew that he could do it again. God had a history of support and care in David’s life. God had actively intervened in his circumstances before, and David reminded himself of the fact.

Remind yourself of past victories and keep praising him in the storm. Ask him to show you a token for good.

Matthew 7:7,8 - Ask, (keep asking) and it shall be given you; seek, (keep seeking) and ye shall find; knock, (keep knocking) and it shall be opened unto you:

For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What are you clinging to?

(one from the archives) 

“Instead of a river, God often gives us a brook, which may be running today and dried up tomorrow. Why? To teach us not to rest in our blessings, but in the blesser Himself.”  Arthur Pink

How often do you find yourself longing for rivers of blessings and yet all you see are brooks that are dried up or only slightly wet from a trickle of water that slowly winds its way over the dirt and rocks?

I have found myself in past weeks, going back and forth from blessing to burden, burden to blessing and back again. Back and forth, back and forth.

One day, my prayers are answered, and the blessings come and the hope within me rises, and then, not only 24 hours later, down it all comes, and the burdens press in once more. Questions arise and fear wells up inside.

What do you do when it seems that God keeps giving you little glimpses of hope only to seemingly dash them just as you begin to rise from the ashes?

Well, you know what they say about riding a horse. When it bucks you off, you don’t give up, you get right back up there, settle into the saddle, feet in the stirrups and try again.

And so, when God gives and then takes away, you don’t jump off and quit trusting. No. You get right back to where you left off and keep trusting. Keep hoping. Keep believing.

You remind yourself of past victories and the blessings God has sent your way and the good he has done in your life. You remember the times he brought you through the deep waters and the raging storms. You focus on his goodness and what you know of him. You hold to the promises found in his Word. You pray, you wait, and you rest.

God does choose to give us blessings one day, rivers flowing and abounding with water, and he chooses to cause the river to dry up and the soil to cry out for thirst. Why? To cause us to trust him. To draw us closer to him. To teach us not to trust in the blessings only, but in him, the blesser and giver of all good things.

To our human reasoning, it seems counterintuitive. It doesn’t seem to make sense that he would withhold blessing from us, in order for us to love him more. But God, in all his wisdom, sees further than we ever can, and he knows that this is the path to growth.

It’s so easy to cling to the blessings and neglect the giver. When things are easy, the burdens are light, the days are bright and sunshiny, we can fall into the habit of walking in our own strength, content to run things our own way, blissfully unaware of who is giving us the very air we breathe.

But when the darkness falls, we suddenly realise our weakness and how small we really are, and we cry out for help longing for those bright blessing days to return.

God longs for us to cling to him through the day and also through the night. Not just on the hard days, but on those wonderful, carefree days too. He desires our worship and to hear praise on our lips, and words of thankfulness from our mouths. He wants us to be reminded of who he is and his faithfulness.

And so, he sends those dry times. He lets the soil be parched at times. He allows us to go through difficult seasons, longing for us to draw closer to him and cling to him. He knows that it’s at these times we need him most and it’s through the trials he sends that we learn more of his character and we see his love all the more clearly.

It is at these times, we begin searching his word in earnest, longing to read the precious promises of comfort we find there and seeking the rest and peace only he can bring. We find ourselves in prayer more often and longing for his fellowship.

If we only had light, we wouldn’t understand the blessing of a rainbow after a storm. If all we had were easy, happy and carefree days, we wouldn’t know of the power of God and his ability to raise the fallen, strengthen the weary and lift the burdened and overwhelmed. We wouldn’t experience the exhilaration of the sun breaking through the clouds after torrential rain and boisterous thunder.

God knows exactly what we need, and he knows just when we need it. The blessings he sends and the trials he allows in our lives are not just an accident. They are carefully planned and orchestrated by the creator of heaven and earth, the Redeemer of our souls.

Although it may seem that at times, God is far away and silent, turning a deaf ear to our pleas, it is far from the truth. He is always near and always watching and leading and guiding, waiting for us to turn to him. It is not him that has moved, but us.

We are the guilty party. We are the ones who neglect to give honour to the blesser. We are the ones that cling to the blessing and neglect the giver.

Let’s not be guilty of only resting in our blessings. Let us rest during our trials too. Clinging to the one who brings peace and comfort. Let us be like the tree planted by the water that is so rooted in God and so content in his workings, that we don’t fear the drought, we’re not afraid of the heat and the pressures that come, because our faith is in the Lord and we know he will bring beauty from ashes and our leaf will stay green and our fruit will keep bearing, showing to all that God is good and he can be trusted.

Jeremiah 17:7-8

 Blessed is the man that trusteth in the LORD, and whose hope the LORD is.

 For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters, and that spreadeth out her roots by the river, and shall not see when heat cometh, but her leaf shall be green; and shall not be careful in the year of drought, neither shall cease from yielding fruit.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Answers to Prayers not even Prayed

 

I prayed my usual prayer for safety on the road, for alertness, for tired eyes to stay open, for a trouble-free trip, for no delays.

And then I got the call that he had been held up getting loaded and the hours began to slip away. And then another call to say that the highway was closed due to an accident and wouldn’t reopen for many hours.

Frustration.

Another day of work banking up due to hours wasted in waiting.

Or was it?

The more I walk this Christian life, the more I am beginning to see that what we call frustration, annoyance, upset plans, delays, God calls divine intervention.

You see, if he had not been held up getting loaded, if he had been on the road when he had planned, he would have found himself on the highway at the particular spot the accident happened and could very well have found himself in a ditch in disastrous circumstances.

God’s delays are never coincidental. They are always planned.

There was divine intervention that day. God knew all along.

God answered my unspoken prayer. He answered a prayer I didn’t know I needed to pray. He answered the prayer that asked for him to be held up so that he would be able to park safely, in reception, near a roadhouse so he could have a meal, and sit and rest for a few hours after a sleepless night.

How were we to know that the upset plans were all part of God’s plan? Hindsight is a wonderful thing, but looking at the circumstances in the moment, it’s not always easy to be content.

Every day we have prayers answered that haven’t even been prayed. We have blessings from God that we don’t even recognize or think to ask for.

Isaiah 65:24 KJV - And it shall come to pass, that before they call, I will answer; and while they are yet speaking, I will hear.

Did you know that there are invisible blessings?

There are blessings that only show themselves by not showing up.

Think about it. How many kilometres has your car gone without getting a flat tyre? How many years have you driven without being in an accident? What about that big tree in the front yard that has never dropped a damaging branch onto your house or car? Or maybe a very scary medical condition that you have never had to face, although you know many personally who have. Or maybe it’s God’s hand of protection over you when you didn’t even realise you were in danger.

These are blessings hiding in plain sight.

We have so many blessings showered upon us that we can’t even see or imagine. The goodness of God is so abundant.

1 Corinthians 2:9 - But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.

God has done so much for us, and he blesses us every day. Whether they are evident or not, they are there. We can’t even fathom the depths of God’s love for us and the things he has prepared for us and saved us from.

Often the reason we don’t see the blessing is because we are too focused on the burden. We have chosen to dwell on all the negative things we see in our lives, letting them sit at the forefront of our minds, when if we changed our view and looked at things from a different perspective, a heavenly perspective, with gratefulness in our hearts, our eyes would be opened, and the blessings would be revealed.

God wants to grow a thankful spirit in the heart of every person. He longs for us to remember that he is the giver of all things and the very breath we breathe, comes from him.

In order to recognize what God gives, we have to have our heart open and alert. We need to be on the lookout for blessings.

And so, keep praying. Keep the communication lines open to heaven’s door. Keep knocking. Keep seeking. Keep asking. But remember that God answers prayers not yet prayed and be sure to give him thanks when those invisible blessings reveal themselves.

But don’t cling to the blessing. Cling to the blesser himself. The Lord, the Creator, the giver of all things good.

Psalm 107:1

O give thanks unto the LORD, for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever.

 

 

 

 

Is your sock falling off?

 

(Here's a post from the archives of 2023)

Do you ever have one of those days where you walk around like everything is fine, but deep down inside your shoe, your sock is falling off? And no one knows it’s falling off, but you can feel it and it irritates you. You shake your foot, hoping that by some miracle your sock will magically rise above your ankle, and all will be right again. Or maybe, you reach down and give your sock a little tug. A half-hearted tug, you’re not really trying, just hoping. And all the while, your sock is slipping further and further down inside your shoe, making your life miserable, uncomfortable, unbearable.

Okay, let’s make an application out of this amusing, yet truthful little anecdote.

I had one of these days just yesterday. As I went about my business, delivering my freight around town, loading and unloading boxes, struggling with heavy bed frames, gym equipment, plumbing supplies and everything else under the sun, I feigned friendliness. I smiled as I handed the goods over, making conversation about the steamy weather, or the rain or how heavy an item was etc. But down deep inside, my sock was falling off.

Something just wasn’t right. I didn’t feel happy, although I put a smile on my face and made pleasant conversation. My mood was downright miserable. I was discontent. Frustrated. Tired and grumpy. I was snappy with my husband for no apparent reason, and it seemed things just kept going wrong. I dropped things, forgot things, had to double back and forth, wasting precious time and no matter how many times I shook my foot, that sock remained in its downward spiral into the depths of my shoe.

It didn’t seem to make sense. I really had nothing to be so miserable about. I had started the morning with my usual cup of tea and toast and enjoyed getting into God’s Word, studying, memorizing, taking notes, spending time in prayer before I headed out for the day.

Okay, so my day did take an unexpected turn in regard to the job description for the day, as my planned half day turned into a very long and full day. But it was nothing that hadn’t happened before. In fact, it often happens.

I just couldn’t shake that miserable, depressed feeling. And as inevitably happens when I begin to feel this way, I started to experience anxiety welling up inside. And then came the whispers. “Look at you. You’re spiralling. You’re going to be back where you were 4 years ago. You are worthless. You thought you were so good, being able to rise up from the darkness and live and breathe again, and now look at you!”

I tried listening to worship music, my favourite playlists, but to no avail. Music almost always works to soothe my soul and bring peace and comfort and ease my mind when it’s in turmoil. But today, it just wasn’t working.

That sock of mine was hanging on to my foot by barely one toe. Slipping. Slipping. Slipping.

Now, some of you may say, “It’s just hormones”. And yes, sometimes that is true. But I knew it was more.

As I searched my mind for what may have caused my inner turmoil and all-round miserableness, I started to remember an adversary of mine, an enemy of every Christian. The Devil.

We are reminded in scripture that the Devil loves nothing more than to devour us and to bring us down.

1 Peter 5:8 Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:

As I struggled to find answers and make sense of my bad attitude and depressed mood, I thought about my morning devotions.

At the beginning of this month, as is my custom, I sat down and wrote some goals for the year. Some of these have to do with learning a new skill or improving and mastering a skill, others have to do with keeping in touch with people in my life on a more meaningful basis. But, quite a few of my goals are spiritual ones.

I wanted to start and finish a 2-year Bible Reading plan. I wanted to work on memorizing certain passages of scripture. I wanted to work my way through my ever-growing stack of books on all sorts of subjects to do with my Christian walk.

I had begun rereading a book on the way our thoughts affect us and was excited at what I was learning and this time, taking copious amounts of notes to cement it into my brain.

And just that day, I had decided to add another thing into my morning devotion time, which meant rising a little earlier in order to achieve it.

Well, now into the middle of January, I had consistently read my allotted passages for each and every day and I had been faithfully taking notes and finding myself excited each morning at what God would show me through his Word and what I could share with others as I write and teach other like-minded women with a desire to learn.

As I went back over my morning and over the goals I hoped to achieve in 2023, I began to see my mood for what it was.

I am not always the quickest learner, and I didn’t realise until it was brought painfully to my attention.

Now, I know when you read what I am going to write next, some of you may think I’m a little eccentric, or weird, or just plain strange. But, in the past, through my months of depression, I had experienced many episodes like this, and I suddenly knew what it was.

But not before I was made painfully aware.

As I loaded my trusty trolley back into the ute, I reached down to raise the very heavy, steel dropside of the ute (which is broken and doesn’t function the way it should). As I did, the whole side fell off it’s hinges and came crashing down onto the top of my foot!  (I’m sure it was the one the sock was falling off)

It was not a pleasant experience, but I managed to bite my tongue, and not yell aloud, not wanting to frighten the lady who had just gone back into her house with her prized possessions.

And this was my epiphany. My moment of great realization. I saw my mood and the reason for it. I saw it as a direct attack of the Devil.

And boy oh boy did my hackles rise. I snapped. If I could have shouted aloud, I would have. But inwardly, I shouted with all my might “That’s it Devil! No more! You want to fight? Well, you got yourself a fight! And you’re about to bite the dust! I have God on my side!”

I realised that the Devil had been taking notice of my morning devotions and my consistent early rising in order to spend time with the Lord. And there is nothing the Devil hates more than a Christian who is striving to walk with the Lord and obey his voice. He hates the Word of God going into our hearts and minds. He hates a passionate Christian. He hates a praying Christian. And he will do anything he can to bring them down. He will use whatever lies he has to, in order to do it.

John 8:44 - Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.

Now, I have nothing to boast in. To my regret, for years I wasted precious mornings not spending time in God’s Word and it is only by his mercy and grace that I am able to do it now, and the marvellous work he has done in my heart through many hard trials.

But I know from past experience that the Devil loves to weave his little lies into my thoughts and those thoughts become actions, hence the bad attitude. Our thoughts truly do affect how we behave.

Well, once I realised I was under attack from the Devil, I may have told him in not so polite terms just where he could go, and remind him he was already defeated and then I found my ‘fighting song’ in my playlist and played it over and over as I tried to sing along, trying not to let the tears stream down my face, as I still had deliveries to make and thought it best not to be a slobbering mess. But I did manage to sing the words with much force and passion, although shaky and out of tune.

Promises in scripture began to come to mind and I repeated Philippians 4:8 to myself, reminding me of what I should be thinking on. What is True. Honest. Just. Pure. Lovely. Good report. Praiseworthy. Virtuous.

And as I did, my spirits began to rise. The sun came out and chased the dark clouds away. I began to find a spring in my step. And that sock, well, it was well and truly pulled up!

Now, in case you’re wondering, was I able to keep my spirits up all day? Well, the pain in my bruised foot was a constant reminder of the Devil’s attack, so that kept my fighting spirit alive, and with God’s help and his Word in my heart, I made it through the day in a much better frame of mind.

But after a night of sleep and another early morning start, the fight began again. But this time I was ready. And as little things started to go wrong, and the clouds threatened to darken the sky, I was able to hold my head up and shout the Devil down.

And, if you were my neighbour, this morning at about 7.30, you may possibly have heard me shout, aloud this time, “Not today, Devil. Not today. You’re not gonna win today!” I didn’t even let him get a foothold. Not even one toe!

So, can I encourage you, when you feel under attack from the Devil, and you begin to believe his lies, open your mouth, shout him down, quote scripture to him, play your worship music loudly in his ears and make sure he hears you singing with all your might songs of praise to God.

Don’t let him get the Victory. He is already defeated. God has already prepared a place for him and his angels, and he will get what he deserves.

You are a Child of God. You are an heir. You are not worthless. You are made in the image of God. You have a Heavenly Father. Satan can never take that away from you. You are held in God’s hand, and it is an Almighty hand, from which no one can take you!

Pull that sock up and keep it there!

Replace thoughts of worthlessness with reminders of God’s goodness and love to you.

Rejoice in the victories God gives you.

Shout in praise that you are an overcomer and God is on your side!

 

Romans 8:31

What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?

 

Psalm 47:1

O clap your hands, all ye people; shout unto God with the voice of triumph.

 

 

 

I’ll leave the light on for you

(from a mother's heart) 

 

I have just discovered yet another term for the season in which I’m living.

I am in my ‘lighthouse era’.

It’s a strange place to be. And although I have technically been partially in this era for 12 years, it’s really beginning to hit home right now, in just the past week or so.

If you know our family at all, you will know that we have 5 amazing daughters. But with daughters comes emotional times. Not just from them as they grow into young ladies and adulthood, but also from their mother.

One of the hardest parts of being a parent, is letting go.

We have just seen our 4^th daughter get married and the 5^th one is very soon to be stepping into the role of wife as well.

Time has flown by and I’ve gone from having 5 little giggling girls dancing around the kitchen in dress up clothes, helping me bake and clean to young ladies all grown up and mature and making their own way in the world, walking beside the one they’ve chosen to do life with, excited at the prospect of a happy future full of dreams and hopes.

And this is where something I read recently really resonated with me and helped me change my perspective a little and gain some insight in my ever-changing identity.

I am in the lighthouse era of motherhood.

Let me explain.

When your children are little, they are in the boat with you. You spend your days making sure they are safe inside the confines of the boat. You steer the course. You carry them through every wave. You keep them safe. They rarely leave your side.

But one day, ever so slowly and sometimes, without you even realizing it at first, they begin to build boats of their own. They begin to venture farther from the shore. They start charting their own course. Making their own decisions. They learn to navigate rough seas on their own.

And for the first time, your job is not to climb into the boat with them every time a storm is near, grabbing hold of the wheel to steer them from the rocks and adjusting the sails.

There is a shift in the dynamic.

Your job is to leave the light on.

Your job is to be the steady light that helps them find their way when the waves tower overhead and the shoreline begins to disappear.

Your job is to be the place they know they can always look for when life gets hard. The voice that whispers, “I’m still here.” The arms that remain outstretched, the home that always welcomes them back.

It is one of the hardest transitions of a mother. It’s not learning to love them less, it’s learning to love them from the shoreline. It’s being the light in the darkness. The welcoming warmth and beacon for them to look for and their safe place.

I have cried tears of sadness at seeing them go but also tears of happiness for the joy I see in their eyes as they walk down that aisle, with eyes full of love and excitement, dreaming of the life they are about to build.

It’s hard to look at the empty rooms. The spot in the yard where their car no longer sits. Their place at the table that is now vacant. The clothes on the line that don’t belong to them. The dark window as I look across the yard and see no light peeking out from the curtains.

But, as hard as it is, it reminds me of what I need to be. A lighthouse. They don’t need me like they used to, but one thing is for sure, I am here when they do.

We are so blessed that our children still want to come home. They still want to visit and sit around our table and laugh as we sip coffee and share what’s going on in our lives. They want to bring the grandchildren home to Grandma’s house to get spoilt. They want to see if there are any tasty delights in the fridge and any chips in the cupboard.

And I am determined to keep shining my light for them. I want them to be able to come to me for guidance and advice and prayer. I want them to know that although I’m not in the boat with them anymore, they are in my heart and in my thoughts constantly.

When things are looking dark and the waves are threatening their boat, I want them to see the lighthouse. I want them to know the light will always be on.

 

 

 

Roll it over onto Him

 

Proverbs 16:3 KJV - Commit thy works unto the LORD, and thy thoughts shall be established.

For some reason this verse in Proverbs will not stay out of my mind. It floods my thoughts. It invades my wakeful hours in the night watches. Certain words pop out like a flashing neon sign as I read them randomly in other contexts. It is a well-known verse and one that I have quoted numerous times along with its related verses.

And so, here I sit, pouring over it once again. Straining to find any hidden meanings. Looking for any sparkling gems or treasures that lie beneath the surface. I dig a little deeper and begin to look into the Hebrew meanings. I read the verses surrounding it, but Proverbs is unlike any other book of the Bible.

There is no particular plot or storyline found in its pages. There are no main characters in the book. What stands out is wisdom. It takes center stage. It is a divine wisdom that spans all peoples, cultures and history. What we read is just as relevant today as it was over 3000 years ago.

I love that we have such a bounty of resources at our fingertips from men and women who have studied and researched and written for our benefit the things they have learned in order that we can better understand the Word of God. I am still and always will be a student of the Word of God. I am not an academic and I don’t even pretend to know the mysteries that lie in the pages of the Bible, but I try my best to interpret scripture correctly through my own study and through using the helps that are easily accessible.

And so, to that end, I want to share what I have learnt as I have dug into this verse a little deeper. I know it is not exhaustive and I encourage you to do your own study.

The very first word in this verse has had me praising God and rejoicing in the word choice as it conveys so much more meaning than a cursory glance.

Commit.

The Hebrew word used here is galal. For years I have treated this verse as a transactional verse. Almost like a gentle suggestion to include God in my planning. And if I did, he would help guide my paths.

But the Hebrew verb is so much more. It carries the physical image of rolling a heavy stone. It holds the meaning of rolling your burden off yourself and onto someone else. This is lifting what is too heavy for you and physically transferring it.

It’s not a transaction. It is a man, literally at the end of his strength, pushing a stone he can’t carry any longer, rolling it off himself and onto something or someone else. This word commit assumes you are already crushed. It assumes the weight is real. The burden is heavy. It is desperation meeting a God big enough to handle what you can’t.

You were carrying something. It was crushing you. And you found solid ground to roll it onto. God. The solid rock.

We see this Hebrew word galal used again in Psalm 37:5 - Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. And again, in Joshua 5:9 where we read that the Lord ‘rolled the reproach of Egypt off the people’. It Genesis 29:3 it literally says that they ‘rolled the stone from the well’s mouth’. Same word. Galal. Commit.

Are you getting the picture yet? By committing our works to the Lord, we are rolling our burdens onto him. We are entrusting them to a God who is bigger and greater than everything we find too heavy to carry. It is a total surrender of our plans and actions to God, trusting him with the outcome.

These works that we are committing can be many things. They can be our everyday plans. Our never-ending to-do lists. Our future dreams and hopes. Our labours. Our endeavours. But all of these things can become weights that we are not able to bear. They can become heavy stones that need rolling over onto a God strong enough to carry them.

Make sure you keep in mind who it is we are to commit our works, our pursuits, our achievements to. Not a what, but a who. Commit thy works unto the Lord. He is the only one that can be fully entrusted with our lives.

And when we do, what is the promise?

Our thoughts will be established. Our plans, our purposes, our intentions, our imaginations. They will be established.

Established.

This is the Hebrew word kun. It has many synonyms and uses throughout the Bible. Fixed. Firm. Stable. Prepared. Made ready. Settled. Strengthened.

This is not a guarantee of success in every human endeavour, but rather an alignment of our plans with God’s will leading to our fulfilment. This goes along with Matthew 6:33 when we seek God first, he brings blessing.

When we roll over our plans onto God, he gives stability to what otherwise might ‘wobble’. He brings peace where there would be anxiety. He causes fruit to grow where there was barrenness.

When we commit our ways to him, he shapes, steadies and brings our plans to completion that serve him and align with his perfect and holy will.

So, are there some practical steps we can take to help bring some clarity to this verse? I believe there are.

1.        Acknowledge the burden or work you are needing to roll over onto God. The first step is to recognize and admit you have something that needs handing over to God. Acknowledge you are in need of divine assistance. Psalm 55:22

2.        Pray with faith. You need to ask God in faith, believing that he will do what he promised. In Philippians 4:6-7, we are reminded that if we bring our requests to God with thanksgiving, he will give us his peace. But we must believe that he is capable of handling the heavy burden we carry. We must pray in faith.

3.        Trust in God’s promises. This goes along with faith. We have to trust that God will fulfil his promises to us. We have to trust that what he says in his Word is true and faithful and he will come through. Proverbs 3:5,6.

4.        Meditate on Scripture. God’s Word brings comfort and guidance. When we saturate our lives with God’s Word, when we read it daily, when we commit verses to memory to think on them throughout the day, we are better equipped to walk through life with confidence. When we are in the Word, we learn more of God and when we learn more of his character, we are more able to fully trust in him. Psalm 119:105

5.        Seek fellowship and support. Here’s where I jump onto one of my hobby horses. Christian community should be a source of support, strength and accountability. We need each other. In Galatians 6:2 we are instructed to bear each other’s burdens. If you are carrying a heavy load, not only do you need to roll it over onto the Lord, but you need the support and encouragement of brothers and sisters in Christ to help you to stand firm and keep on going when life gets hard.

6.        Practice gratitude. I can’t emphasize this one enough. I have seen it work over and over in my life. Gratitude helps to shift our focus off our burdens and onto the blessings we have been given. The simple act of thanking God for at least 3 things each day, writing them down and praying them back to God in thanksgiving is life changing. Try it and see if I’m wrong. Gratitude will give you an attitude adjustment and change your perspective. 1 Thessalonians 5:18

7.        Release control. This is not an easy one. This means we have to let go of the outcome and the future we have planned in our head and surrender it to God. We have to surrender to God’s will and his perfect timing, no matter how senseless it may seem. In Psalm 46:10, we are told to be still. The Hebrew word for ‘still’ is the word raphah. It doesn’t mean to sit quietly with your emotions. It doesn’t mean to sit in silence. It means to LET GO. Release your grip. Let it fall. Stop striving. Stop trying to control what you were never meant to carry.

8.        Rest in God’s sovereignty. We have to rest in God’s supreme rule and absolute authority over all that exists. We can rest in the knowledge that God is orchestrating all things for our ultimate good. We need to learn to trust and rest in the knowledge that God knows all things and is in control of all things and is a holy and just God. If we can do this it will bring more peace in our lives. Just knowing who God is and what position he holds can help to settle us and we will be more able to roll our burdens onto him. Romans 8:28

So, if I can encourage you today to do just one thing, to take one small step in the right direction, it would be this.

Take that ‘work’, that heavy burden, that ambition, that pursuit, that labour, take the stone that you’re carrying that is too heavy for you, the weight God never asked you to carry and roll it over onto him. Commit it to him. Trust the outcome to him. Don’t continue to let the burden of what you’re carrying crush you. He is able to bear it.

Commit it to him and let him steady you. Let him give you a firm footing. Let him bring his peace to your mind and soul.

1 Peter 5:7 KJV - Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.