Are you guilty of looking over the fence?

 

There’s an old saying that goes,

“The grass is always greener on the other side”.

I was listening to a sermon today and in it a phrase jumped out at me so loudly I had to pause and write it down.

The grass is greener where you water it.

Profound right? Well, it was to me anyway.

I began to think about this statement and how it applies to our everyday lives. We are often dissatisfied with our lot in life, unhappy with our circumstances, discontent with what we own. And all too often, we look around us at the lives of others and begin to covet what they have. The grass just looks so green on their side of the fence. They seem to have it all.

Social media has done a lot to put fuel on the fire of discontentment. At the touch of a button, we are able to view the lives of others and we find ourselves wishing we were more attractive, skinnier, richer, had more time for leisure, worked at a different job, had more kids, had less kids, went to a better church and the list goes on.

But all is not as it seems and I’m sure I don’t have to tell you this. We all know that you can’t believe everything you see. The grass on the other side of the fence, green though it may be, could very well be fake!

So, how do we get our grass to be as green as what we perceive? We have to water it, of course!

If we want our friendships to flourish, we have to work on them. If we want our children to succeed and grow up to be God-fearing, responsible adults, then we have to do the training and the praying and the hard labour. If we want long lasting marriages, we have to work at it.

Nothing is free and grass doesn’t green itself. It needs water. It needs attention. It needs feeding.

Can I speak to those of you that are married for a moment? Tomorrow, marks 27 years of marriage for Dave and I. And I pray for another 27 on top of that, or more! But how did we get to this place? Yes, by the grace of God, but also, with a lot and I mean a LOT of hard work! A lot of watering, nourishing, feeding, pulling up of weeds, and a whole lot of unconditional love.

The grass is greener where you water it. If you want a beautiful, God-honouring marriage that has you madly in love with your spouse for years upon years, desiring only each other, wanting to spend as much time together, never wanting anything to come between you, then you have to put in the hard yards.

I am far from perfect, and I’ve made my fair share of mess ups, been stubborn and pig-headed, argued, cried, had adult tantrums etc, but through it all, I knew that if I wanted my marriage to survive, I needed to do my part, which is 100 percent. Spoiler alert: There’s no 50/50 in marriage. It’s 100 percent on both sides, no holding back, full speed ahead.

So, if you want the grass to be green, give it some hydration. Look after it.

Whatever the grass is in your current season, whether it be your marriage, your children, your health, your job, your finances, your church, whatever it is, put your heart and soul into it. Look after it, just as you would a beautiful garden that you want to stroll through, admiring the blooms that you planted.

Don’t be continually looking over the other side at what others have. They might look like they’re ‘crushing’ it with their inspiring posts and insta-stories. They may show you a side of their lives that is only a half truth. It may look like they have it all together, but most probably, they’re looking over at you wishing they had what you have.

The Bible doesn’t tell us to look over, it tells us to look up. Look to the Lord Jesus Christ.

Psalm 5:3 My voice shalt thou hear in the morning, O LORD; in the morning will I direct my prayer unto thee, and will look up.

Use him as your role model. He is the one we should aspire to be like. We should be striving to be more like him every day. When we look around, we will never be satisfied, but when we look up, we will find what we need. The knowledge of what we have as believers in Christ should encourage our hearts like nothing else. Our identity is to be found in him. He is the one that tells us who we are and what we should become.

And if we follow him and follow righteousness, we will find life.

Proverbs 21:21 He that followeth after righteousness and mercy findeth life, righteousness, and honour.

And not only life, but life more abundant!

John 10:10 The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

The grass will only grow greener as you water it. Tend to your own garden and quit coveting someone else’s. Don’t desire to set foot on their tender green shoots but grow your own and sink your toes into the lushness that could be your life and your grass.

Water it. Nourish it. Cherish it. Live it.

And let God get all the glory.