New Roads, Old Roads and Short Memories.

 

In looking over some old posts this afternoon, God led me to this one. I don’t know who it is that needs to hear it, or maybe it’s just for me, but I pray it will be an encouragement to you as I repost and revisit this thought. God bless.

 

When things don’t go the way we plan, we want to believe that it’s only temporary, and that life will soon return to ‘normal’. But what if the road you are now on, is the new normal? What happens when God creates a ‘detour’ that is actually the new road?

We all want our ‘detours’ to be just that.  A temporary changing of our nicely laid plans, to be returned to the way they were once the time of testing is done.

But God doesn’t follow our plans. Our plans are flawed. We are short-sighted. We don’t have God’s perfect vision. We can’t see so far ahead as to know what may lie in our path.

When God puts us on these new roads, we question Him. We can’t understand why He would choose to take us down a bumpy, windy, narrow and dangerous road. We long for the ease of the ‘old road’. In our minds, we are certain that the old road was the good road. The old road was paved with ease. If only God would get us off this wild detour and give us back our old road. “Surely this is just a detour, Lord?” And we hear His soft answer, “No, my child. This is now the road.”

Why is it we remember the old roads as being so easy and so ‘normal’? Have we forgotten the giants we faced while travelling that road? Why do we remember them better than they actually were?

When the Israelites were wandering in the desert, they began to question God’s love and His ability to provide. They remembered only the good things about the Egypt they had been delivered from.

Numbers 11:5-6 We remember the fish, which we did eat in Egypt freely; the cucumbers, and the melons, and the leeks, and the onions, and the garlick: But now our soul is dried away: there is nothing at all, beside this manna, before our eyes.

But they had forgotten something very important. They had forgotten that in Egypt, they were slaves! There they were, complaining about not having garlic and leeks, and longing for the Egypt they remembered, somehow forgetting the part about being slaves!  What kind of memory is that? Had they forgotten the many times they cried to God to deliver them out of slavery? Their lives in Egypt were far from perfect.

But are we any different than the grumbling Israelites? Do we choose to grumble and complain about the circumstances God puts us in and forget all the blessings He has showered upon us?

The new road God has us on may seem hard and it may seem unfair. But God has a purpose for each and every road He asks you to take. The old road may have seemed less bumpy, but the new road will lead you closer to Him.

Often, when life is easy, we neglect to notice our surroundings. We rush blindly on, oblivious to what is around us. The bumps in the road cause us to stop and to seek God as we question his ways. The twists and turns slowly drive us closer to the Lord. We cling to Him as we know that it is only Him that can help us through.

On a personal note, I know a little of new roads and unending detours.  A few years ago, God took me on a road I thought would never end. He took me through a time of darkness that was so dark I could almost feel the inky blackness. I cried out to Him continually. I didn’t want to be on this new road He had me on. I wanted everything to return to the old way. I resisted, I fought, I cried. I asked for deliverance repeatedly and yet, it didn’t come. I longed to return to normal again. I wanted out. I didn’t want this trial.

God had me on a very difficult road. But He knew that I needed to be on that road. He knew I needed to draw closer to Him than ever before. He knew that by taking me down this new road, I would never be the same. I would seek His face. Morning, night and noon. All day long. I would run to the Rock. I would be driven to Him. I would need him as never before, and when it was all over, I would be walking closer to Him, and I would have a deeper relationship with Him than I could ever had imagined.

I would have new promises from the Word of God to cling to when the waves threatened to overwhelm me. I would have a stronger set of armour to defeat the Devil’s attacks. I would understand more about the things we wrestle with and the importance of being armoured with God’s armour.  Ephesians 6:12

But God in His love and is compassion didn’t leave me there in that dark place. He brought me through. He was there beside me the whole time. Anytime of night or day that I cried out to Him, He was there. Listening. Answering. Loving. His promises held true. The strength He gave me enabled me, with His help, to fight off the attacks of the Devil. To let the Devil know that he had already been defeated and he would never win.

He led me through the way I didn’t know. Through paths I had not travelled. Down a road that was to become my new road.

Isaiah 42:16 And I will bring the blind by a way that they knew not; I will lead them in paths that they have not known: I will make darkness light before them, and crooked things straight. These things will I do unto them, and not forsake them.

We all know that hindsight is a wonderful thing. I only wish we could have better sight during our trials. But really, if we knew what God had instore for us in the future and the difficulties He would have us face, we would just lay down and die right there and then.

God and God alone knows what He wants you to face, and He knows how much you can bear. And even when you are sure you can’t handle anymore, He gives more grace and enables you to take that next step. One foot after another. Step by step. Moment by moment. He will bring you through.

God wants you to remember His goodness. Remember His promises. His love.

Psalm 77:10-12 And I said, This is my infirmity: but I will remember the years of the right hand of the most High. I will remember the works of the LORD: surely I will remember thy wonders of old. I will meditate also of all thy work, and talk of thy doings.

These verses were a comfort to me during my long road. I had to daily make a choice to remember the works of the Lord. I had to make a choice to meditate on them.

And now, years after coming through to the other side, I have even more to remember. And I have more to share with others. God has helped me to become more sensitive to others’ needs. To show more compassion. To show more love. To desire to reach down a hand and lift the fallen. Where once before I may have shown a callous indifference or even a judgemental attitude to those in dark places, I now see them with different eyes. Eyes that have been opened through hard times. Eyes that now can see what they couldn’t see before.

2 Corinthians 1:4 Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.

There are so many verses in the Bible that I would love to share with you. God sees what you’re going through. Even if no one else knows the struggles you’re facing, God knows. He sees. He orchestrates. Trust Him. Let Him lead you through. Let Him be the light you follow. Psalm 23 still holds true today as it did in David’s day.

Psalm 23:4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

 Don’t let the thought that your detour is your new road be a discouragement to you. Take it as a challenge. A challenge to deepen your relationship with God. A time to draw close to Him. A time to learn. A time to grow and a time to share what God has brought you through.

New roads don’t have to be feared. 

They can be faced with courage!

 

 

 

A Piece of Quiet – 

Dealing with the Overwhelm

 

Let me be honest with you for just a moment. Today has been a struggle. And you know what? Yesterday was too. 

Sometimes, we as fiercely strong and independent women don’t like to admit that we are struggling or that we’re feeling overwhelmed.

But facts are facts. We ALL face the burden of overwhelm at some point and we would do well to acknowledge it, name it and then get busy doing something about it.

I think that often, as women, we get that ‘overwhelmed’ feeling. We try to be the best mothers and wives and homemakers we can be. Some of us have work outside the home that takes precious time away from the endless list of chores that looms overhead as we walk through the door. We constantly feel pulled in every direction and we long for a piece of quiet. Not just peace and quiet. But a piece of quiet. Just a moment. Time to be able to get off the merry-go-round of life for just a little while and breathe. Time to let go of the mental load that we carry. Time to sit and enjoy that sunset. To experience the sound of a melodious birdsong in the quiet of the evening. Or to sit by the ocean watching the waves as they crash onto the shore and take in the warm salty air. 

Life gets so busy, and those peaceful moments never seem to come. We long to have our burdens lifted and the things weighing on our minds taken away. We think that if we could only go away for a few days holiday, that things will be better. Life will look brighter.

But if we really think practically and reasonably, we know that although a holiday is nice, the jobs are still there when we return. The overwhelm is there waiting to descend.

Now, I’m not trying to depress you here. But I am a realist. Let’s not beat about the bush, ladies. This here is the facts. Life is a struggle. Overwhelm will come. But how do we keep the overwhelm from overwhelming us? How do we keep our circumstances from defining us? How do we live in chaotic situations without the chaos becoming part of our being?

We do it with the Lord’s help! You knew I’d say that didn’t you? Yes. The only way we can keep from being totally overwhelmed is by God’s peace. His perfect peace.

I don’t have any great 10 step programs to lead you through or any quick fixes that promise to bring you instant peace. But I do know, through many trying experiences that God is able to do exceeding above all that we ask or think.

Some of you know that I went through a dark period of overwhelm, anxiety and depression a few years ago. What was it that lifted me up from my pit of despair? The one thing that pulled me through was the Word of God. It was God’s promises that upheld me and drew me closer to thim than ever before.

I’d like to share some of these beautiful Words of scripture with you. I know that most likely, every woman who is reading this post is struggling with something. And if you’re not, then you will. Facts are facts. The Bible is clear on this point.

John 16:33 - These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.

This verse doesn’t say that you ‘might’ have troubles. It says you WILL. It’s inevitable. But aren’t you glad that’s not the end of it? The verse goes on to say, “be of good cheer; I have overcome the world”. Praise the Lord! We have an overcomer! And if I could read this aloud to you right now, I would shout that last statement. WE HAVE AN OVERCOMER!

Here are some precious verses found in the Word of God that may be of some comfort to you as you struggle through the storms of life. I pray that God would speak through them to bring peace to your overwhelmed heart.

Read them aloud. Meditate on them. Write them down.

God gives rest for our souls

Matthew 11:28-30 - Come unto me, all [ye] that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke [is] easy, and my burden is light.

God will guard our hearts and minds

Philippians 4:6-7 - Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

God is a firm foundation

Psalm 61:2 - From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

God brings peace

John 14:27 - Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

God is not the author of confusion

1 Corinthians 14:33 - For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints.

God will never forsake you

Deuteronomy 31:8 - And the LORD, he [it is] that doth go before thee; he will be with thee, he will not fail thee, neither forsake thee: fear not, neither be dismayed.

God is strong enough to carry your burdens

1 Peter 5:7 - Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.

God will uphold you

Isaiah 41:10 - Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.

God will renew your strength

Isaiah 40:31 - But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

I was reminded yesterday of a verse that became so dear to me as I cried it aloud to the Lord, over and over again, on a daily basis throughout my time of extreme overwhelm. A very tear-stained notecard sits in my desk drawer as a reminder of God’s goodness to me and His deliverance at my lowest point.

Isaiah 43:2

When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.

I want to remind you that not only is Christ our overcomer, but we too can be overcomers. We can hold fast to our faith in the Lord Jesus Christ when trials come. We can stand strong in the face of battle. We can put on the armour of God and stand against the devil. We can face the overwhelm and triumph over it.

We don’t have to live defeated lives. We are not fighting FOR victory, we are fighting FROM victory! God has already won! We just need to be reminded of who is fighting for us and who our overcomer is.

We can pass through the waters and through the fire and God will keep us in the safety of his encircling arms of love. He will hold us fast. God alone can keep you from heading into an anxiety spiral that pulls you down further than you want to go and keeps you longer than you want to stay.

The only way you can fully grasp hold of God’s peace is to totally trust Him. To give ALL your burdens to Him. To lay ALL your cares on Him. Lay them at His feet and step away. Leave them there. Don’t pick them back up. Let God lift the weight off your shoulders. Hold to His promises. Read them. Meditate on them. Share them.

And as God brings that blessed peace back into your life and you feel the overwhelm melt away and the joy grow, give Him all the glory and praise Him for the wonderful and awesome God that He is.

For those of you who, like me, need a list of to dos or some practical steps to help you in your moments of overwhelm or anxiety, here are some things that help me.

1.        The very first thing is to PRAY! Cry out to God and ask him for help.

2.        Read over verses that help give you strength and comfort. (Hopefully you have these somewhere handy, so you can pull them up at a moment’s notice)

3.        Pray the scripture aloud, claiming the promises as you speak truth over yourself.

4.        Text a friend to ask for prayer. Make sure this is a trusted friend that you know will stop what they’re doing and pray for you right there and then.

5.        Go for a walk. Get out in nature, get some fresh air and take time to enjoy God’s creation.

6a    Listen to good, Godly, uplifting worship music and meditate on the words. 

6.    Hydrate! Stop and have a drink and eat something. And maybe take a nap. Often what you need is a snack and a sleep (read more on this here: A snack and a nap)

(Another thing I do is to read over some of my previous posts, to preach to myself what I’ve preached to others, because if it helped me then, I know it will help me now. Maybe you have articles or sermons you’ve saved that will encourage your heart – go back to them and refresh your heart and mind)

You may find that as you go through difficult times, other things that you do will that help you. Remind yourself of them and do what works for you.

Keep God at the centre of your life and make sure he is your first port of call, NOT your last resort!

I pray God will bring you the peace you need for each and every day.

God bless xx

 

 

 

 

Find your people and

 start doing life together!

 

Okay, so I’m back, with possibly the last part of my lesson, but I’m not making any promises.

In the last couple of posts, we talked about the ‘whys’ of community and we dealt with the ‘what’, so we now come to the ‘how’.

It would be wrong of me to explain what it is and why it’s so important and not give you some practical ways of living it out and tips on how to build this thing I’m so passionate about.

Let me begin by quoting from a book by Jennie Allen:

“There are scientific studies that show how many relationships we can manage and how we socially interact with people. Basically, we can handle a network of only about 150 people. Think of your Christmas list. People you talk to at least once or twice a year. Inside that 150 are layers of friendships that deepen with how much time you spend with the person and the degree of your relationship with them. Research suggests that we can handle only 50 people in what we call our acquaintances. Within those 50 people there are 15 people in our village and within our village we have a capacity to make five of them our BFF's. Only five! How much time you spend face to face with a person is what determines where they fit in your 150. And what pushes people deeper into our inner circles of friends? The amount of time we spend with them. TIME.”

Can I tell you something? YOU CAN’T HAVE WHAT YOU’RE NOT WILLING TO BECOME.

If you want friends, you have to become one. (Proverbs 18:24a)

If you want Godly community, you have to be willing to put the work in.

In Jennie’s book, she shows a graphic of 4 circles, all set within each other. At the centre of this is God. Working out of this into the next circle is the inner circle, then onto the village (community) circle and then a circle labelled acquaintances.

Take some time to think right now about the circle called acquaintances. This is a very large circle. There may be 50 or more people in this circle. It is made up of people from all walks of life. You may know only their first name. Maybe it’s the lady at the post office or the fruit and vege market or maybe your accountant, a business owner or the cashier at your local supermarket. You don’t have any real connection and only ever make small talk with them.

Then we come to the next circle, moving closer to the centre. The village circle, or what I like to call, our community. This is a medium sized group and there may be only 10 to 30 in this group. This is a very diverse group of consistent, interconnected people. Our fellow believers at our local church, our childrens’ friends’ parents, Sunday school teachers, pastors, Bible study leaders, ladies in your coffee get togethers etc.

With this number of people, we don’t have time to do life with them in any sort of meaningful way, but they are still very important and necessary. They can pray for you, help you when you’re in need, talk about spiritual matters as you learn together and serve together in ministry. They are a very vital part of what we need in our lives. See my last post - https://learnliveloveshare.blogspot.com/2025/05/were-all-in-this-together-in-my-last.html

This group forms the support system that we so desperately need in difficult situations and the hard times we face. Without it, we will not only experience loneliness, but we will miss out on the much-needed prayer and love it brings.

It is also the place where we serve God together in evangelism through our local churches.

Next, we move on to the inner circle. This is a very small circle. It may be only 3 or 4 people. But these are the people you keep in touch with day by day. They know you and your heart. You can be vulnerable with them and share with them more than what you would share with your village or church community. You can laugh and cry with them.

They are determined to chase after God. They are faithful and faith filled.

You may have a few and they may not even know each other. And they’re often very different. They could be different ages or personalities. But one thing they have in common is that they are available. They are transparent. They will fight for you, alongside you and fight with you against sin. They are present. Physically and emotionally. And they are the ones you spend the most time with, outside of your family.

So, who do you have in your inner circle? Is their faith strong like the sick man’s friends who tore through a roof in order to see him healed?

Did you know that Jesus had an inner circle? Peter, James and John. The Bible does not say why Jesus chose Peter, James, and John as His inner circle. Possibly he was making a special effort to prepare these three for the leadership roles they would later occupy in the church.

These three men were present with Jesus during special events, being eyewitnesses of Jesus’ transfiguration (Mark 9), witnessing Jesus raise Jairus’s daughter from the dead (Luke 8), and they accompanied Him while He prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane (Matthew 26). These three witnessed Jesus’ greatest moments of glory and also some of His darkest trials. They were His closest friends.

If Jesus needed an inner circle, how much more do we?

What is it that sets these levels of community and friendship apart? TIME. It comes down to how much time you spend with them.

We can’t skip the village/church community level and hope to magically find our people that will form our inner circle if we are not working on building community with our fellow believers.

So, in our lonely world, how do we rediscover the joy of deep connection?

One of the best ways is HOSPITALITY.

1 Peter 4:8-10 KJV - And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins. Use hospitality one to another without grudging. As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.

The believers in Acts met daily for prayer and shared meals. Daily is probably unrealistic to us, but the point is they spent time in each other’s homes. They were hospitable people.

Hospitality defined means: the act, practice or quality of receiving and entertaining strangers or guests in a friendly and generous way.

Notice in this verse in 1 Peter it says without grudging? Some translations will say without grumbling or murmuring. The Greek word literally translates to murmuring or muttering.

So, we’re not supposed to complain about being hospitable. We’re supposed to do it cheerfully.

But what if your house isn’t perfect? What if you’re not the best cook? IT DOESN’T MATTER! Your house doesn’t have to be perfect and neither does the food. Be friendly. Be generous. Have an attitude of love and let God’s light shine by doing it cheerfully.

Recently, we had a family over for dinner and I was frustrated that something I had made didn’t turn out as planned. I was told nicely by our guests, “We didn’t come for the food, we came for the fellowship”. A good reminder.

Read this quote from another favourite author of mine: “Living a life of welcome opening both your heart and your home means your stuff gets used. And reused. Over and over again. Your items get nicked and scratched your carpet and rugs and linens get stained. While this doesn't mean we don't try to make our surroundings pleasant, it does mean we learn to accept some degree of imperfection. Well used items often mean that we have loved well.” K.Ehman

Are you loving well? Does it show?

Okay, so let’s wrap this up with 7 points on how to build your community. Of course, this list is not exhaustive and there is much to be said and so much more to be added, but I pray that this will help get you started on the path to reconnection and community building.

1.        Notice who is already right in front of you: Look at who is in your church, your Bible study, your gym class, your neighbourhood or school. Could it be there are close friendships waiting there? Who is literally right in front of you?

Start viewing acquaintances as friends in the making. View them as potential friends. Look around at your church community. Who has God put in your life, here and now and right under your nose, that you haven’t connected with yet?

2.        Put yourself out there: Plan to go first. Don’t wait for someone else to initiate. Connection takes stepping out again and again. Sometimes you get tired of no one reciprocating. This may sound harsh, but here it is. GET OVER IT!

You will never have friends, and you will never build community if you’re not willing to consistently initiate. Be the one who reaches out. Get over the awkwardness of putting yourself out there. Jesus was an incredible initiator. He noticed people. He stopped for conversation. He even invited himself over for dinner and stated that he would abide (or dwell or stay) at a tax collectors house. (Luke 19)

3.        Start great conversations: Don’t be satisfied with only shallow, small talk. Yes, it’s important, it is the foundation for deeper conversations. But to have deeper conversations, you have to not only learn to listen but also learn the art of asking more intentional questions. Don’t be afraid to go deeper.

When someone shares something hard with you, sit with them and their feelings for a bit and don’t try and fix anything. Ask what it is they need right now. Share the real stuff. If you can’t go deep with someone, don’t get discouraged. Don’t quit. Give them space but keep trying with others until you find your people. Not everyone is ready for deep friendship.

4.        Talk about Jesus: This is so important. When we put Jesus at the centre of our relationships and when we talk about Jesus and how he is moving in our lives, our friendships are being built on something that lasts. When we see God in others, we see his character revealed and he becomes more beautiful to us.

Our conversations shouldn’t be void of Jesus. If we are both determined to chase after God, we won’t have time for pettiness and gossip and competition because we will be focused on becoming more like him and our friendships will be better for it. We need to consistently be sharing things we are learning from his Word.

5.        Be quick to forgive: (see this post -  https://learnliveloveshare.blogspot.com/2025/04/me.html) 

      We are all flawed, and we all hurt one another. We let one another down. We have disagreements. Accepting this fact should cause you to have grace for every other person who comes into your life. We have to show love and forgiveness. Keep short accounts. Don’t let anything fester and turn into bitterness.

6.        Do fun stuff together: We don’t just have to connect in a Bible study setting or church setting. Do a fun activity together. Find something in common to do that will help you let your hair down and laugh together. Maybe a trivia night. Bowling. Games night. It’s a great way to get to know people and who they really are.

Sometimes Christians are labelled as ‘boring’ because for some, they see having fun as a sin, thinking that we need to appear super spiritual at all times. But King Solomon lets us know that there is a time to laugh and it’s okay (Ecclesiastes 3:4)

7.        Be okay with only a few: It’s impossible to invest in dozens of deep, intentional relationships. We don’t have that capacity. We need to focus on the few. And yes, these few will change over the years as the seasons change. Remember that deep friendships take time and as life changes and distance separates us, so too does our closeness. This is not because of a lack of love, often it is because God is encouraging you to step up and pour into someone else’s life for a season.

Every one of us have people in our lives that need us and people we need. Are we intentionally spending time in both of those categories? It is costly to love people. It’s easier to just stay casual. Love takes risks. Love takes forgiveness and grace. Love takes effort, time and commitment. And because this is the cost of deep relationship, we don’t have the capacity and space to go deep with everyone. We have to become intentional with a few. (inner circle) And that’s okay. We don’t all have to be besties. But we do need to show love and compassion to all.

Let me close with this. Be careful not to isolate yourself from the very people God wants to use to help you grow. Look for your people in unexpected places. Life stage doesn’t matter. Age doesn’t matter. Find the people who are following hard after Jesus and then go and grow with them. Find a shared purpose. Working and serving together creates life-giving bonds.

Cultivating friendships and deepening relationships in our lives is not a luxury, IT’S A NECESSITY!

Thinking you can go through life and its struggles without close friends and community to hold you steady is like thinking you can go into battle without your armour!

Just because the ache of loneliness is real and so widespread in our society, doesn’t mean it has to be your reality. You have the power to flip the script and make meaningful connections. You were created for community. It’s not easy. But it’s worth it.

Will you allow yourself to need others and will you allow them to need you?

 

It’s your choice.

CHOOSE WISELY!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We’re all in this together

 

In my last blog post, https://learnliveloveshare.blogspot.com/2025/05/yes-its-hard.html we looked briefly at what community is all about and we touched on why it’s important to be building it in our lives. There is so much more to this subject that it was hard putting it into an hour-long lesson along with the extra things to read that I was able to give out at our recent conference.

In this post, I want to go a little deeper into the ‘why’. The why of community.

If you remember reading about the giant redwood trees, you’ll remember how important it is for them to grow in ‘tribes’ or communities. They give each other support and strength and nourishment through their interconnected root systems. And so should we.

We need each other!

Let me give you 4 points on why Godly Christian community is so important.

1.        Community is a gift from God

So why do we need community? Because God has given it to us as a gift and we need to accept his gift. God doesn’t choose the gifts he gives, haphazardly and without thought. No. Each gift is an intentional act of love.

The first community in the Bible was found in the Garden of Eden with Adam and Eve. (Genesis 2:18). Not only did God give Adam a helpmeet and companion, but he also walked with them in the garden. (Genesis 3:8)

God knew the importance of having another person to lean on in life. He knew the value of community. Sadly, through sin, they broke the fellowship they had with God and often it is our sin and selfishness that breaks the fellowship we have with other believers.

2.        Community is vital for Christian growth

a.        Godly community challenges you to be more like Jesus

In the book of Hebrews, we find an interesting verse. This verse has all too often been taken out of context, but we won’t go into all that in this lesson.

Hebrews 10:24-25 KJV - And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works: Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.

In this verse, we are told to encourage each other to do good. We are to encourage each other to pursue God. We are to provoke each other to love. As we do life together, we help to refine each other. (Proverbs 27:17)

We can show Christ’s love to each other and challenge each other to reflect the heart of Jesus. As we grow in our Christian walk, we help to spur others into action as they see how God works in our lives.

a.        Godly community strengthens your relationship with God

As you encourage each other in the faith and learn and study together, you deepen your relationship with God because you encourage each other to be in the Word, to be in church, to serve the Lord, to be in fellowship, to pray for one another etc.

You strengthen your relationship with God as you challenge each other to go deeper and develop a closer walk with him.

3.        Community is vital for our well-being

a.        Godly community is a place where we can get our physical needs met.

Did you know that true, authentic, healthy, Godly community should be a place where you meet others physical needs? Take a look at this passage in Acts.

Acts 2:41-47 KJV - Then they that gladly received his word were baptized: and the same day there were added unto them about three thousand souls. And they continued stedfastly in the apostles' doctrine and fellowship, and in breaking of bread, and in prayers. And fear came upon every soul: and many wonders and signs were done by the apostles. And all that believed were together, and had all things common; And sold their possessions and goods, and parted them to all men, as every man had need. And they, continuing daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, did eat their meat with gladness and singleness of heart, Praising God, and having favour with all the people. And the Lord added to the church daily such as should be saved.

The church in Acts was a healthy, authentic community. We have to be humble enough to ask for help when it’s needed and we have to be willing to give help. Maybe it’s a meal that’s needed. Maybe it’s help moving house. Or cleaning. Or a financial gift. The body of Christ should support and love each other in practical ways.

The Christians in Acts were intentional in their serving of others.

b.       Community helps carry you emotionally

We know that no one except God can meet all of our emotional needs, but we can help meet some.

Galatians 6:2 KJV - Bear ye one another's burdens, (heaviness; weight; trouble) and so fulfil the law of Christ.

We are to support each other in the hard times. We have to be real with each other, in order to know how to help. If you don’t share with others some of what you are carrying, they will have no idea how to help.

Sometimes when we are weak, we have to borrow some strength from a friend. Then we can stand stronger. If we know someone is cheering us on, it helps us to keep going. We have to be there for each other. We need to be able to cry together. Laugh together. Pray together. Worship together.

c.       Community meets our need for love

Everyone needs love. God gave us the gift of each other to meet the earthly need for love. God’s love is amazing and unconditional and can’t be compared, but having a physical, tangible person who loves you, here on earth, is a great comfort especially when times are hard.

1.        Community is vital for our mission

Godly community is so important for the mission we are called to, of loving God, loving others and being a light that brings others into his family through faith in him. See John 13:34,35 – Others need to see our love. As you live and serve within a Godly community, it will help to open your eyes to the needs of others.

1 Thessalonians 5:14-15 KJV - Now we exhort you, brethren, warn them that are unruly, comfort the feebleminded, support the weak, be patient toward all men. See that none render evil for evil unto any man; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all men.

We are called to meet the needs of others. When we’re part of a healthy community, we are called to strengthen those that are weak and encourage those that are discouraged. Being part of a community of believers calls us out of our self-centeredness by giving us the responsibility to look outward.

When we take the focus off ourselves and look around, we will see the needs of others and our love for God should spur us on to passing that on through love and service.

There are many ‘one anothers’ in scripture. Take some time to study them. You’ll find exhortations to love one another; encourage one another; provoke one another (in a good way); forgive one another; be at peace with one another; be kind to one another and the list goes on.

We can’t have an effective ministry without unity, and we can’t be effective without a healthy, Godly community. If our mission here on earth is to spread God’s Word and build his Kingdom, then we have to get along. We can’t be busy fighting amongst ourselves, or we’ll neglect our mission.

Building a loving, healthy, life-giving community is vital to spreading the gospel.

So, knowing all this, how in the world do we do it? How do we find our people and build our community? It won’t happen without some work. It takes love and intentionality. But, how??

In my next post I hope to give you some practical tips on finding your people and building your community. Hint: Time plays a key role.

God bless xx

 

 

 

 

Yes, it’s hard. But it’s worth it!

 

Have you ever seen a Redwood tree? Or a photo of one? What a majestic sight they are! They are some of the largest and tallest trees in the world. Their seeds are as small as a tomato seed and yet they can grow to around 100metres tall. That’s as high as a 35-story skyscraper!

They can have a lifespan of over 2000 years, and their diameters can reach up to 8metres across!

But interestingly, they only have a very shallow root system, reaching only 5 or 6ft deep.

So how are they able to live so long and grow so tall without toppling? How have they survived earthquakes, landslides, floods, strong winds, and other trees falling against them?

Connection, that’s how.

They intertwine with the roots of other redwoods for added stability. Their roots can extend up to 30metres away from the trunk of the tree. So, they reach out, not down.

When we look at a giant Redwood, all we see is the height and size of the tree but there is an intricate network of intertwined roots underneath.

This intertwining creates a strong support system that helps the trees withstand powerful winds and storms. These roots form a complex web beneath the forest floor.

The process of root intertwining, or “root grafting,” goes beyond just providing structural support. Through their interconnected root systems, neighbouring trees share essential resources like water and nutrients.

This mutual sharing of resources ensures the growth and survival of every tree in the redwood forest. If a neighbouring tree is struggling or injured, the surrounding trees can provide extra support and nourishment through root grafting. It’s like a natural safety net that helps maintain the health of the entire forest ecosystem.

When one tree has an abundance of resources, it can share them with its neighbours that may be in need.

So, redwoods do not survive alone…EVER. They form “tribes” or communities. Sometimes they grow so close to each other that they merge at the base into one tree. Each tree supports and protects the other.

What does this remind you of?

What a great picture of our need for one another in the Body of Christ.

WE NEED EACH OTHER!  

 

Well, what a blessed few days I have just had! Last week, I was blessed to attend and speak at a Ladies Conference where women from Katherine and Darwin gathered to fellowship, learn, study, connect and grow in our Christian walk.

The theme for this year’s conference was “Unity and Community”, building connection and growing and serving together as a Christian community in order to reach a lost world.

I wanted to try and summarize my hour-long lesson into a blog post for those who could not attend and also as a refresher for those who came. Unfortunately, the audio of the lesson didn’t work and as some have asked for it, I will do my best to formulate a very condensed version and hopefully not lose the context and content of what was said. You won’t be able to experience the visual object lessons, and the emotions expressed, the atmosphere of the room and the connection we felt, but I pray you will be encouraged as we all were with what we learned from our days together.

I will break the lesson up over a few days, so the bites are not so large, and you can take some time to chew them over.

 Grab a cup of tea, get rid of the distractions and settle in.

 

Raise your hand if you’ve ever felt lonely? Everyone has felt loneliness at some point in their life and possibly even right now. Please know this. You are not alone in your loneliness.

We are more “connected” (online) than ever before, but studies have shown that we are lonelier than ever.

When was the last time you had a long, deep conversation, face to face, with a friend?

One of the key reasons for loneliness is that we give up too easily. Friendships take time.

Remember when friends were easy to come by as children? If they happened to live in the same neighbourhood, they instantly fell into the friend category. Proximity created friendship. It was as simple as knocking on the door and asking them to come out and play. We didn’t wait or hesitate or overthink. It’s a lot harder to navigate friendships as adults.  

I want to answer these 3 questions:

What? What’s the big deal about community?

Why? Why do we need each other? Why do we need community? Why is it important to God?

How? How do we find our people? How do we build community? What are some practical steps to building live-giving friendships?

So, what is community? In a nutshell it is this: a group of people with a common characteristic or interest living together within a larger society, sharing or having certain attitudes and interests in common. A unified body of individuals

Simply put, the Christian community is composed of those who love Jesus and fellowship with each other and serve one another.

If you don’t already know this, hear me now. We need each other. King Solomon puts it like this:

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 KJV - Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.

We have assigned this passage to romantic relationships. It does apply to marriage, but it was more than likely written in the context of friendship. Healthy, Godly community is supposed to be just as supportive as a healthy, Godly marriage.

Right from the beginning God designed us for connection. (Genesis 2:18). We were built for community. God is a community in himself. God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit, living in perfect harmony for all of eternity, past and present and future.

It’s God’s idea for us to live in community with others. He is a relational God who designed us in his image. Built within us is a pattern for experiencing intimate relationship with God and then expressing that love to others.

Relationships are one of the greatest gifts we have on this earth, but they are also one of the most difficult parts of being alive. Would you agree?

We need invested friends. People who have the potential to make us better. We need friendships that go beyond a Sunday morning greeting, a brief hug, a handshake and a comment about the weather. We need people who will hold us accountable and are devoted to growing in their spiritual walk and will encourage us in our walk. And we need to be that friend to others.

All too often, we don’t tell it like it is. We put on a brave face and lie about life. We want people to think we’re stronger than we are. But sadly, we’re only robbing ourselves.

God gave us the gift of community. We need to make use of it.

When we don’t share truthfully, we miss out on carrying each other’s burdens, but we also miss out on rejoicing with each other. (Romans 12:15)

There are a lot of reasons we go to church, but one of them is to build a thriving, loving, Godly community.

Building a community takes time and effort. It requires us to step out of our comfort zones, prioritize relationships, and be intentional with our time. Making time for it can feel like just one more thing to manage. But it’s so important. We are stronger together.

Building community and unity is not just about needing others, it’s about living the way God designed for us to live: TOGETHER!  Isolation may feel easier for the moment, but it’s not sustainable or fulfilling.

One of my favourite authors said this: “We spend hours alone in our crowded, noisy, screen-lit worlds, we invest only sporadic time with acquaintances, and then we expect close friends to somehow appear in our busy lives. We’ve replaced intrusive, real conversations with small talk and substituted soul-baring, deep, connected living with texts and a night out together occasionally.”

It’s sad that over the past few years especially, we have decided that we can exist on our own. We’ve replaced physically meeting with each other on a regular basis with online church and zoom calls and work from home and self-serve checkouts and online shopping etc.

When we try to navigate life on our own, we miss out on the joy God gives us in relationships. We were never meant to carry our burdens alone. We were never meant to celebrate our joys and successes alone. No matter how much you may think you can master it all on your own, and no matter how independent you are, you need others. And others need you!

Remember, investing in relationship and building community is not simply about pursuing our own happiness. It’s so we can be effective for eternity. It’s so that others will come to know Christ because of our love for them. Our love and connection speak volumes to a lonely world. (John 13:34,35)

Let me remind you though, that unity is NOT uniformity! It doesn’t mean dressing the same. Acting the same. Worshipping the same. Believing the same. Yes, we need to agree on the core doctrines of the Bible if we want to have true fellowship, but unity is not uniformity. One size doesn’t fit all.

Unity is about finding common ground and working together.

Uniformity is about forcing everyone to be the same.

Unity has to do with oneness. Being one in purpose. Being in harmony.

There are many passages in the Bible that mention “one mind”. Philippians 1:27; Philippians 2:2; 1 Peter 3:8 just to name a few. (Take some time to unpack the verse in 1 Peter and you’ll find some interesting gems in understanding what the words mean. Hint: harmonious; tender-hearted; compassionate; friendly; kind.)

Community and unity are related to fellowship. If you’d like to read more on the subject of fellowship as we find it hidden within a word in Hebrews 13:15,16, then go and check out my blog post via this link: Fellowship connection

Can I remind you that it is so important to be grounded in the life of a local church. It’s where discipleship takes place, compassion, friendship, encouragement, accountability, exhortation, prayer, mentoring, shepherding, teaching, discipline.

We belong together. We need each other. We are not perfect. We are a community of fallen and redeemed sinners who come together to do life together and to help each other in the name of Jesus. 

Let me give you an example of why we need each other and why who we connect ourselves to matters.

Mark 2:1-5 KJV - And again he entered into Capernaum after some days; and it was noised that he was in the house. And straightway many were gathered together, insomuch that there was no room to receive them, no, not so much as about the door: and he preached the word unto them. And they come unto him, bringing one sick of the palsy, which was borne of four. And when they could not come nigh unto him for the press, they uncovered the roof where he was: and when they had broken it up, they let down the bed wherein the sick of the palsy lay. When Jesus saw their faith, he said unto the sick of the palsy, Son, thy sins be forgiven thee.

Did you notice that it was the friends’ faith. NOT the sick man’s faith? You can’t tell me that your friends don’t matter! What kind of support system do you have? Are they there for you when you need them? Are you there for them when they need you? And what kind of faith do they have?

If you contrast this with the man found in John 5 who sat by the pool of Bethesda, hoping for a miracle, you’ll see that he had no man. He had no one. He had no community.

Are you getting the point that we need each other? Do you understand that it is important to God that we build strong friendships and authentic Godly communities with our fellow believers?

Christianity is not a faith that’s meant to be lived out alone.

In the next blog post, I want to give you some reasons in the form of 4 points as to why community is so important.

In the meantime, take some time to dig into the Word and look for yourself. How many times is unity mentioned? How often do we see the phrase one mind? Look for examples of God’s people supporting each other and working together.

God bless and see you soon xx